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Saturday, March 10, 2007

I Won't Be Watching 300

...inasmuch as the gay porn I prefer has the guys stabbing each other with their penises to their mutual delight rather than self-righteously hacking each other to death with their big boring blades. I quite understand, however, that the boys these days need simultaneously to feel all rough and tough even as they whomp themselves up into pointlessly pissing themselves in abject fear here in Bush's America, what with us feminazis to contend with and the global war on terra 'n all. What could be better at a time like this than blowing glossy light-saturated slow-mo kisses via the bloodyminded misanthropic mind of Frank Miller to an unspeakably despotic militarist hell that left the world not a single worthy cultural trace except for the vestigial echo of an exhibitionary he-howl of the kind every stinky asshole showoff at the gym burdens the world with every day of our lives anyway to our endless dull despair. For those who pine for antiquarian manflesh, honest homoeroticism, and a not-too-embarrassing indulgence in philosophizing here and there, I would recommend Amorous Mundyites turn instead to Derek Jarman's first feature length film, a dramatization of the ordeals of Sebastian, filmed with no money at all but with a surfeit of lean lovable big nosed men, in Latin of all things, with English subtitles.

5 comments:

gf said...

Meh. It was ok, but not that great.

Robin Zebrowski said...

Whoa, I hadn't realized any of Jarman's films were on DVD. I've got about 3 of them on VHS but I had to pay through the eyes for them at the time - they were hard to acquire. I'm glad someone saw fit to issue them on DVD. (I've never seen Sebastian, though).

Dale Carrico said...

Lots of Jarman is on DVD now -- but my favorite, Wittgenstein, isn't unfortunately. Oddly enough Caravaggio isn't on DVD yet either, tho' Jubilee, Edward II, Tempest, Sebastian, and a couple of others are. I lurve his movies! The fact that the flabbergastingly fabulous Tilda Swinton is in so many of them is possibly a factor...

Robin Zebrowski said...

You know, I just realized I *have* Jubilee on DVD. My awesome mother gave it to me as a birthday present, but I kept thinking it was Kenneth Anger and not Jarman. Sometimes I'm just dense.

Caravaggio is one of the films I have on VHS. Blue is still my favorite of his films though.

Dale Carrico said...

I've never "seen" Blue, actually. Your endorsement is just one more reason to scout it out. Speaking of Kenneth Anger: a collection of early pieces (up to Pleasure Dome) is on DVD. Some of it is just fracking amazing!