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Sunday, June 15, 2014

Bodyguard Blanket: Duck and Cover for the School Shooting Epoch

America cannot implement the most obvious most sweepingly popular gun safety regulations, but, fear not! Con artists seeking profits with idiotic technofixes and vacuous security theater are on the job! Yay, Murca! The following video is not a parody, as neither were the original Duck and Cover spots in a different epoch of American insanity:

I'm rather disappointed I couldn't find a clip I overheard in a news story on this topic in which champions of the Bodyguard Blanket in a full froth of 300 fanboy enthusiasm started handwaving about how the kiddies can use the unwieldy bright orange shells to crawl into invulnerable "phalanx formations."

Smash the state, anarcho-freedumb is on the march! A Good Guy cyborg vigilante with a big gun and a Bodyguard Blanket cyborg shell for every innocent child is all the law white supremacy needs!

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